A Place to Belong

Have you ever asked yourself, "Where do I belong?", "Where do I fit in?", "Do I belong here?" There are times and seasons in each of our lives when those questions may seem overwhelming and without an answer. But this quest for belonging, which is shared by many women, is one that begs for an answer. I have certainly found myself asking those questions and searching for answers on more occasions than I would care to admit. But I find comfort in knowing that the only way I can ever expect to find answers is to first admit that I need them. And so, I share with you my quest.

As I reflect back on my life, I believe that this need to feel like I belong began very early. I was the youngest of four girls and never quite fit in with my older sisters growing up. It's not that I can blame them as there were six year separating me from the sister closest to me in age. Thankfully, as we got older things changed but the early years weren't met with a lot of acceptance.

The event that precipitated my most recent search happened a few weeks ago. I attended an exercise class at my son's school. Upon my arrival, women were clustered together in the foyer having a discussion. I felt like an outsider as I asked whether they were there for the exercise class. Once the class started, I watched as some of the women were able to easily follow the instructor's moves (thus fitting in well) and others enjoyed laughing and joking with one another. I, however was not able to do either. I made attempts to insert myself into those groups but I came away from that time more convinced that I didn't belong in that environment. It wasn't that they were purposely excluding me, it was simply that I did not belong within this established group.

And so my questions began anew. I asked God why it was so difficult for me to find a place to fit in and whether I was wrong for having that desire or need. It was a common refrain from my lips to His ears, particularly over the past 2 years as I struggled with the pain of having to leave behind a place where I felt I belonged--truly belonged. But on this particular time before the Lord, He did an amazing thing for me. He reminded me of a very wonderful truth--I BELONG TO HIM!


During my morning quiet time, I was looking for something in God's word that would speak directly to me, and in turn speak to you on this concept of belonging. I felt drawn to a very familiar passage--Jeremiah 31:3:

"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying:
I have loved you with an everlasting love;
I have drawn you with loving-kindness"

Now I must tell you that my initial reaction was not one of deep gratitude and thanksgiving. I knew this passage and had read it many times. As a matter of fact, I said, "Okay, Lord this is a very familiar verse to me and I was kind of looking for something a little more profound. I don't see how this has anything to do with belonging." I am sure that at that point, God just smiled at me and then waited for what He knew would eventually come. After I finished having my "know-it-all" moment, I felt compelled to look deeper at this scripture.

The word LOVE screamed at me to give it attention and so I did. I did a search on the specific word love used in that verse and found that it came from the Hebrew word Hesed which refers to a love that is loyal, steadfast, faithful and stresses the idea of "a belonging together" of those involved in the love relationship. There it was! This love that God has for ME, this love that God has for YOU is a love that says we belong to Him! Oh, how I hope you are able to fully grasp this.

As women, connection is important to us-- even to the most avowed loner. We are emotional beings and find those connections essential to our well being. That is how God has created us. And although God has designed us for relationships with others, we must never lose site of the fact that He first designed us for relationship and fellowship with Him.

No matter what season of life you or I are in, whether we feel that we belong in one circle or the next; it doesn't matter. WE BELONG in an amazing love relationship with God.
And that answer was well worth the wait. :)